When’s the last time someone opened a conversation with praise, only to follow it with a subtle dig at everyone else?
This compliment followed by an insult in sales outreach is becoming more common, and while it might seem clever, it destroys trust faster than almost any other communication habit.
For a moment, you feel good, seen, appreciated, maybe even a little excited about where the conversation is headed.
And then the air gets sucked right out of the balloon.
This is happening more and more in sales outreach lately. Someone reaches out cold, leads with a compliment, and then pivots straight into tearing down an entire industry, group, or category of people. On the surface, it looks like they’re trying to create quick rapport. Underneath, it creates the exact opposite.
Why This Trend Breaks Connection
Sales is rooted in trust. And trust requires safety.
The second a seller says something like, “You’re amazing—unlike everyone else who does XYZ,” the listener’s mind goes straight to:
If they talk about others this way… what are they saying about me when I’m not in the room? When they move on to the next conversation?
Instead of deepening connection, this pattern creates suspicion. The compliment suddenly has a sting to it. What was meant to flatter actually diminishes the relationship.
The Real Issue: Insults Cancel Out the Compliment
There is nothing wrong with giving someone an authentic compliment. In fact, it’s one of the simplest ways to build rapport when done well.
And the moment you follow that compliment with an insult (especially a comparison to “everyone else”) you undermine your credibility and erase the positive impact you were trying to create.
It doesn’t make you look confident or make the recipient feel special. It simply creates doubt.
A Better Way to Use Compliments in Sales
If you use compliments in your outreach (and you should) keep them:
Authentic
Specific
Relevant
Free of comparisons or negativity
A genuine compliment can open doors. A compliment wrapped in an insult will close them just as quickly.
So the next time you reach out to a potential client, remember: sincerity builds connection. Insults (even subtle ones) break it.
Use compliments generously. Use them thoughtfully. And leave the put-downs behind. Let's leave the compliment followed by an insult in sales outreach trend in 2025!
Find the podcast episode about this here: