How To Establish a Rapport Through Social Media

Have you ever sent a DM and gotten no response—or worse, been left on “read”? It’s one of the most frustrating parts of using social media to grow your business. You put yourself out there, but your message falls flat.

So what happened?

Here’s the deal: When you're reaching out to someone for the first time, especially on a platform like LinkedIn or Instagram, it's important to get clear on your objective. If your outcome is to get them to buy something right away, you’re likely to be ignored.

Instead, shift your focus to how to establish a rapport through social media.

Start With the Right Mindset: Conversation Over Conversion

Before you type a single word, ask yourself: What do I want to happen in this first exchange? If your answer is, “I want to make a sale,” that’s a red flag. Social media is not the place for cold, hard pitches. It's a space for relationship-building.

The key is to prioritize conversation over conversion. When your goal is to spark a back-and-forth rather than push a sale, the tone and content of your message naturally shift.

Make It Personal

Generic messages like “Hey girl” or “Dear sweetie” are instant turn-offs. People can smell a copy-paste message from a mile away. Instead, use their actual name. “Hi Kristen” is a simple start, but it shows respect and intention.

Lead With a Compliment

Everyone loves a genuine compliment—especially one that’s specific and relevant. Did you watch a video they posted? Listen to a podcast episode? Read a recent article? Call it out and share what you appreciated about it.

Example: “I listened to your recent podcast episode on personal branding, and I really appreciated the story you shared about navigating imposter syndrome.”

Ask a Question to Spark Dialogue

Now that you’ve led with value, ask a simple, engaging question. This helps keep the conversation flowing and gives them a reason to respond.

Use a softening phrase like:

• “Is it okay to ask what inspired you to share that story?”
• “Would you mind sharing what helped you work through that challenge?”

These types of questions feel conversational, not interrogational. They also show genuine interest.

Ditch the Shotgun Approach

Sending out mass, impersonal messages is what I call the “shotgun approach to sales.” It’s ineffective, demoralizing, and frankly, annoying to your prospects.

If you’re going to spend time doing outreach, make every message count. Quality beats quantity every time.

Build Rapport Before You Pitch

When the person responds, you’ve opened the door. This is your chance to continue building rapport. If the conversation goes well, then (and only then) you can ask if they’re open to a next step.

Sales success on social media comes from connection. Remember: Relationship first. Rapport always.

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