Do You Come Across As Demanding?
Would prospects/clients and colleagues describe you as demanding? And, how would you feel if they did?
When people are defined as demanding, it usually means they are especially hard to satisfy according to www.vocabulary.com. With that description in mind, is that how you want to be known?
Is This How You Ask?
In the last few weeks I’ve noticed a new pattern of requests coming my way. People are reaching out and letting me know they’d like to schedule a time to chat with me about collaborating with them in some way. They then go on to tell me to use their calendar link to schedule a time to chat with them. Hmm, would you define that as demanding? They’re asking for time with me and then ask me to do the work to get on their calendar.
How about this? I received a text message from a colleague that states, “Please call me.” Nothing more than that. Is that demanding?
Rapport First – Relationship Always
Maybe you’re thinking, well, it depends on the relationship you have with these people. And if that’s your train of thought, I agree (mostly). It’s one thing to text your significant other or close personal friend with a message that states, “Please call me” after trying to reach them multiple times. However, no matter how much rapport I have with someone would I never just state, “Please call me” with no explanation. You either sound desperate or you should demanding. Neither of those are good unless it’s an emergency situation.
And, if you want to build rapport with a prospective client or collaboration partner, there’s a much better way to demonstrate the level of respect you’ll show said person in your dealings together. It’s definitely not sending over a calendar link and telling someone to schedule a time with you because you want something from them.
Put Forth Some Effort
Using scheduling software is awesome, I use it for clients who I already have rapport with and it’s used for their benefit, not mine. It’s used to make it easy for them to schedule a time that works best for them. More importantly, it’s positioned that way in the messaging.
When I want to schedule a time to chat with someone and pitch something to them, I would NEVER in my wildest dreams consider sending them a scheduling link and telling them to schedule a time to get on my calendar. It’s lazy and it can come across as if I think my time is more valuable than theirs. That is not a message I want to put forth when trying to earn someone’s business or enter into a partnership.
Now in all fairness, I don’t think any of these people who sent these messages intended to sound demanding. However, in my NLP studies, we learned a valuable presupposition that states, “The meaning of your communication is based on the response you get.”
Therefore, you want to set yourself and the other person up for success. Make is easy for them without sounding like you expect them to do all the work. One of the ways I do this (and I teach this to my clients) is I use the 3 Times Technique. It has specific language that shows respect to the other person and makes it easy to get a time scheduled.
There’s A Better Way
My 3 Times Technique is giving people options of times so they can pick one that works best for them. I do the work, I provide the time ranges. This is one of the most effective ways to get on someone’s schedule while keeping rapport intact. In case you’d like to lean more about this technique, consider joining the Sales Maven Society now where you’ll receive access to a myriad of sales trainings including the 3 Times Technique.
Sending good wishes to you.